Beautiful

Everything is chaos now
I recognize it cus’ I know
My wall, capable of holding all
Is now only salt, crumbling tall

In the night I tumble, turn and toss
Grieving unearned gains and loss
Dreaming of what could’ve been
Realizing I could never have seen

So I sit here with hasty breathing
Accompanied by my own spirit seething
Realizing my actions we’re really good, actually
Well thought out and actually based on the past I learned from

I don’t think I need to abide by my rules
I proved myself to myself in the past, I simply did not witness
So shut up
I am in chaos now, but I always revel here

It’s simple
This is known to me
Here I can be me
I am here, in this beautiful distress