Spotlight

Loneliness is sometimes you standing on a stage
Bright lights and eyes focusing on your presence
You feeling all the glaring beams targeting you
You looking at them with an averted gaze

Averted to not notice the reception
Of your jokes and the volume of laughter
That you want to hear after a well placed joke
Because that volume doesn’t matter much

Much of what happens is only decoration
Surrounding the stage of your chosen role
While you’re rolling forwards in time while
Standing still is the only thing you’re able to do

To be is heavy enough, in this theater of it all
Being becomes just a trick, a trick of the trade for you
Jack of all trades. Your feelings never show
Is never noticed, you alone observe what you feel

That is why the spotlight is your own safe cell
The role you play seems jokingly easy because
It has become an easy joke to expect true understanding

That’s why you decide when you turn the lights off
When you return to the solace of your bed
To endure your loneliness alone